Post Op Haemo:

Two weeks after the op, and still barely mobile, Lee drove me back to DBN for my post-op check and to have my staples removed. This latter procedure had occupied my mind for some time already. The opsite was still numb in places but obviously quite sensitive in others and the thought of having staples plucked out along the cutline was very intimidating. The stand-in surgeon made matters worse by exclaiming that he was a little inexperienced with staples and did not like doing them! I was lying on the bed, facing the wall with a facial grimace embodied by Lee's comforting hands. The surgeon was just trying to figure out the functionality of the staple-remover when the proper surgeon arrived. In the nick of time, the instrument was handed over and I can honestly say that another painless minute later, all the staples were out! Most I did not feel due to local numbness, those I did feel were no more than a little ant-bite.

On Saturday 3rd April I hopefully did my last haemodialysis session. I spent the prior week weening myself back onto my normal bag system (CAPD) at reduced volumes in an attempt to get things working again since the op. I was on the haemo machine at St Anne's in PMB every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday for the last four or five weeks. Each session was a tortuous 4 hours long and I really battled with sitting through each one patiently. I read, I sudoku'ed, I did crosswords and tried to sleep...it was nightmarish and I mercifully beg that it really is over! The boredom aside, haemo also knocks you physically and leaves you quite weak and useless, particularly on the days you have it. This has contributed to some of the most difficult weeks of my life.

Two or three weeks ago a GP found that my HB (Red blood cell count)was very low..7.1 which explained my extreme sense of exhaustion at the time. I was always totally exhausted and out of breathe and could not move from couch A to couch B without collapsing. Furthermore, I still had, and have, an infected chest which is just adding to the ill-effects I am already subjected to. The doctors only just refrained from prescribing a blood transfusion, as I was a borderline case, and instead have put me on a course of injections to gradually raise my HB. The fun side of course is that these are administered three times a week, into my belly...and by my own hand! I know the diabetics will have little sympathy!

So, to collate all these events together - post-op anaesthetic effects; heamodialysis; chest infection; very low HB and the occasional bout of gout - resulted in an almost deathlike, zombie existence the last few weeks. Medically, and technically, it is the worst condition I have ever been in in my entire medical history! As if that physical part was not bad enough, I ran into a brick wall emotionally, thinking the worst with waves of despair and hopelessness. It was a difficult time for me, but terrible for Lee and the kids too. I thank God for my wife and her strength that she found against all odds. I needed physical and emotional support from a wife that was just as beaten, yet she provided in sickness as she does in health. It is not easy managing a home and family while your husband can do little more than move from couch to bed to couch.

Today, Tuesday 6th April, I am sitting in my office at work. We spent the Easter weekend up in Zululand with friends where we left the boys to spend a week. I was the one of the last to leave a 40th party on Saturday night, was up early as Easter bunny next morning, went for a long walk with hills, and even drove all the way home yesterday! So, in short, I am finally feeling a lot better than I have been over the last few weeks. I'm not sure if its the HB injections starting to work or not, but I sure am doing much better. I am no longer just 'up' but am also 'about'! Of course I am not about to run any marathons but its really hard not to be so upbeat about a marked health improvement. Coming from where I was, I feel great.

That's physically. Emotionally, in terms of worry, despair, pity etc. I think I am also cured for now. I have acknowledged that this whole future lies in God's hands and I have fully accepted and welcomed this knowledge. What will be will be, and it will be Gods will. Only faith can keep out my human tendency toward despondency and worry, so if I focus on my faith, I should be sorted!